THE GIRL IN OUR FAMILY

 The girl in our family, our cockapoo, was a surprise present for our youngest son, when he was in 4^th grade.  JonPeter’s new puppy, he named “Snuggles.”  Of course, his older brother Matthew, in his usual way, said, “what kind of name is that for our dog, sounds like a beanie baby.”  Well, it didn’t take long before I realized and all of us felt that Snuggles, lived up to her name.  It was an ideal name for our tan and light-haired sweet and cuddly furry friend. 

I never had a dog growing up, so it took some adjustment, especially during the puppy stage.  Training, feeding her healthy choices, setting limits in the house and creating her space, not leaving her alone for too many hours, grooming her beautiful hair with soft curls, and finding a reliable and loving dog sitter when we travelled or needed someone to step in and care for her.  I stuck to healthy pet food with added homemade protein that I mixed in some days, which made Snuggles a healthy and happy member of our family. 

Prior to Snugs, I had not experienced the concept of, “a dog is man’s best friend.”  Snuggles taught me this every day, showed me her unconditional love, remained loyal to me always and became part of the fiber and personality of the family.  She treated each of us equally, judgement and meanness were not in her character. Isn’t that terrific!  Why can’t humans be so terrific?   She protected my boys always, relieved anxiety that was circulating in our home, and assisted in keeping the good spirit and happiness for all of us.  There were days that the boys didn’t want to go to school, and just saying, “Come on Snugs, it’s time for school,” caused her to jump to the door, wagging her tail, influencing the boys to soon follow by getting to the bus stop with a smile. She saved me so many times from the angst when my boys would “get up on the wrong side of the bed.”  Snuggles was just the best, a very healthy, complacent and friendly dog who was a solid member of our family for almost sixteen years.  She was playful, she always wanted to be in the room where we were hanging out, and she looked at each of us fondly, with adoring eyes.  She loved joining us on the boat and thrilled JP when she went tubing with him.  The vision of her hair blowing in the wind, looking excited yet scared remains with us.

We gave her a Sweet Fifteen birthday party as I secretly (never to say out loud) didn’t think she would make her sixteenth birthday.  We invited friends and family with their dogs on a beautiful Sunday afternoon.  We played games, such as musical chairs and fetch the ball; we served doggy treats, lit candles on her doggy cake and sang the Happy Birthday tune.  Doggy favors for all our dog guests were well received.   A memorable day, with sweet photos taken, mostly of JonPeter and his favorite creature on the planet.

Then the day came in August 2020, which was two weeks prior to Snuggles sixteenth birthday.  Over the past year and one half, she had developed a large tumor on her leg close to her left paw, which was growing.  It started as the size of a marble, then a ping pong ball, quickly a golf ball and finally as large as a lacrosse ball.  It didn’t seem to bother her, the vet didn’t want to remove it, and JP cared for her wound regularly, as if he was her mother and doctor.  Snuggles never complained, stayed silent and calm when JP bathed her and bandaged her every day.   It happened, her wound burst and she bled all over the kitchen floor.  We lifted her to the sink, lightly ran cold water on her and patiently waited for her to stop from profusely bleeding from her left leg.  She appeared to be, no pun intended, “on her last leg.”  Vince and I and JP hung over the sink and wept.  I had never cried like that before.  It had been a long time since I saw the emotional side of JP, and Vince, true to character was crying nonstop.  He’s that type of guy.

After about 3o minutes, Snuggles laid down in the sink, closed her eyes and looked like she left us.  The sounds of our cries got louder, the tears flowed more and the feeling of loss overwhelmed us three.  Somehow, after a few minutes, Snuggles opened her eyes and we all felt shocked that she was still with us.  She wasn’t ready to leave.  She needed for Matthew to come home, so she could have her last goodbye with the four of us together.  Matt was on his way from the city, and the mid-afternoon traffic caused him to arrive two hours later.  In the meantime, the instructions were for us to keep Snugs wrapped in a towel, have her situated in her bed on the couch in our family room, and for one of us to be sitting by her side, always keeping some touch to her body for comfort. 

Vince, true to character, was desparate to contact the vet and put this all to an end.  JonPeter, with his typical personality, could not accept that Snuggles was ill and would be leaving us.  JP did not want her dog to be put to sleep.  He defiantly responded to Vince’s suggestion with, “Why do you want to kill my dog?”  I of course, trying to keep the peace and the anxiety low, said to Vince, “JP is not ready, he will get there.”   Matthew eventually arrived, somewhat frazzled.   When Snugs heard Matt’s voice, she propped up her head, got excited to greet Matthew, who she always adored.  Matt, true to his character, responded to Snuggles reaction by saying to us, “What’s the big hoopla about; she looks fine, she’s not dying.”  Of course, the remnants of the blood bath were cleaned up, Snugs was laying cozily in her bed unable to walk, and her adoring face was still the Snugs we all knew so well and loved.

After about an hour, Snuggles began to cry out loud, and looked visibly uncomfortable.  It took JonPeter all but one minute, before he said to me, “Mom, I think I’m ready.”  It had hit him.  His furry friend was in pain and was dying.  Matt now knew it was time for Snugs to cross over the rainbow bridge.  We all calmly drove to the vet, who was five minutes away.

We got to say goodbye to our “best friend” all together.  We calmly saw her at peace, and we all accepted that it was best for her and for each of us.  During this time of despair, we all had reacted and remained true to our character and personality, each different and fair.  Only a loving pet, only our Snuggles, our Snugs, our best friend could bring this reality to the forefront in such a way, at such a critical time.  I’m grateful for that awareness, for our almost sixteen years with “the girl in the family,” and with experiencing the forever love that our dog brought to our family.  RIP Snuggles, thanks for the memories, we all love you!